This Sunday's Musings - My Big Break

There was once a time when I wanted to be a contestant on The Wheel of Fortune. This was shortly after I had given birth to my son and began to consume large amounts of television programming as a hobby, since I was pretty much confined to the house with no sitter and nowhere to go. Every day I’d watch Pat and Vanna from my rocking chair and one day I figured I’d had the game down to a science, even how to spin the rigged wheel just right so as not to go bankrupt. I called down to channel 7 and was told that in order to become a contestant I would have to call back early in the morning on the first day of every month until they had enough contestants for the month. For about 4 months I did this, lol, never getting past a busy signal for hours. It’s funny to me now that I actually did this and was so hopeful about it and was trying so hard. I really wanted to be on that show. I thought it would be my big break. At the time, I couldn’t see or conceive of a better way to improve my life. I was trying to ice skate up hill, lol. These days I appreciate what time has given and taught me.

I’ve always had sort of a pioneering spirit. I inherited that from my mother and my grandmothers. I blogged once before about my paternal grandmother literally saving up pennies in order to buy her first home. How’s that for determination!? When I was in elementary school my neighbor and I tried our hand at a lemonade stand, like the white kids did on T.V. Turns out that folks don’t buy much lemonade in the inner city. Then in high school I sold candy bars that I was given as payment for volunteering for an organization. I made enough money to buy myself a couple of Esprit outfits and a book bag from TJ Maxx. Nobody could tell me jack! Haha. In eleventh grade, my English teacher asked me to join a young entrepreneur’s summer program at USC, but that same year I had landed a cool job selling merchandise at Disneyland and had just gotten fitted for my shoes and uniform. Naturally, I was torn. Disney was paying me, the summer program was not. So, it was a tough decision to make but, even though I was really proud of my interview for the Disneyland job, I thought the entrepreneur’s thing would be much more interesting and beneficial in the long-run. So I bid Mickey ado and spent my summer writing a business plan, learning how to invest in and follow stocks, shopping wholesale downtown and bought a bunch of stuff in bulk to sell at the flea market. I opened my first savings account, and pitched my business idea to venture capitalists for a micro loan when the summer ended. But by then I had also met a guy who commanded much of my attention. Fast-forward about two years later and there was my stint with sewing. My boyfriends’ sister taught me how to sew so I made a few smocks for work and got a couple of my coworkers to pay me to make them some, too. I was a new mom and hustling harder than ever. I still have that damn Bedazzler that I just knew was going to make me some money, lmao. So embarrassing. Anyway, for years I’ve dreamt of starting a business and working for myself. I’ve devoured many, many books on the subject and even had a business license and online store once upon a time, but something always got in the way of my plans. That ‘something’ has become a "9-5" habit now, a sort of safety net, but my grandiose childhood dreams still linger. I think if I was ever really going to do it, now is the time. I’m older, wiser, more established…and more frightened than ever! But I’m toying with the idea again, nevertheless. Maybe this time something will stick and end up being my big break :)