I saw my crush today. I haven’t seen him since…April, I believe. I was in the cafeteria grabbing something for lunch since my tuna sandwich plans had fallen through, and on my way out someone was holding the door for me. I looked up and saw that it was him! I was so happy to see him :) he walks like Stringer Bell, lol. And he wears pointy shoes w/ his lab coat. My guess is that he’s a doctor, maybe even a surgeon, since every time I’ve seen him he’s been around the Surgery Center and he’s either in scrubs or a labcoat w/ pointy dress shoes. He’s probably about 6 feet tall and in great physical shape, and he speaks Spanish. So today, since I wasn’t expecting to run into him (literally) at all, I just said “thank you” for holding the door open for me. I mean, what else should I have said, “Can I have your babies?” I don’t think that would’ve gone over well, despite it being a sincere query. I’m just happy he still works here and I got to lay eyes on him again. One day I will come up with the mustard to say something more substantial to him. But in the interim, I will just sigh and enjoy the view and his gait as he walks away.

Kendrick Lamar reminds me of my youth. I grew up around, dated, and crushed on boys like him.  Listening to him is like listening to all of black L.A. Reminding me of Eric/Deluxe from FBI crew who tagged my name all over businesses up and down Jefferson, that boy whose name I can't remember who was friends with Crystal's boyfriend and got shot in the head that night when I was in the 10th grade, right in front of us. Crystal couldn't stop talking about the "yellow oozing" from his head, no matter how many times we told her to shut up. Chris riding around all day on his BMX. Dorsey football games.  Ditching class and walking to McDonald's. Rogers Park. Skate Land USA. Taco Pete! Man, I loved the beef burritos at Taco Pete. I remember the time this drunk couple left their baby at that taco stand, lol. Willowbrook Park and Lil Rob having a crush on me in 6th grade but I was scared of him and his super gangstered-out family. Mona and Kaniesha. Marion and her jheri curl.  Crystal and Trecie. Highland Elementary. World on Wheels. Carver Elementary. 24th Street School. Crenshaw on Sunday's. The Fox Hills Mall on Saturdays, ALL day long until closing.  We'd stand outside huddled in the cold at 9pm waiting for Crystal's mom, Willetta to come and pick us up. And I found boys like Kendrick to be cute. They liked me too. Mm hm.  As a matter of fact, he kind of looks like Rodarryl's little brother, Roc (Rocshaundrick).  Listening to Kendrick is like listening to home. I get happy feelings.  I am reminded of my life and where I came from, who I am, and where I always fit in.  My son, who was raised in Pasadena, just don't know. 

I went to see Beyonce in Vegas last month.  Great show.  Worth seeing at least once but I doubt I'd pay to see her again anytime soon.  Maybe in another 15 years or so when she's a legend?  I don't know.  I've always been more of a fan of her business sense, work ethic and determination more than her music.  So once was enough for moi.  Vegas, on the other hand, I am absolutely done with. I'm so sick of Vegas it's not even funny.  Just a bunch of casinos in the middle of the hot desert and I don't even gamble.  I've seen every hotel and casino and stayed in most of them, and I'm not a party girl so there is absolutely no novelty to Vegas for me.  I'm pretty sure that was my last time going for a very long time, if ever again.  Someone that I'm fond of will have to be getting married or celebrating something special there for me to ever venture to the desert again.  I'm over it.

Went to see Letters From Zora today at the Pasadena Playhouse and cried at the end.  I love Zora Neal Hurston so much and Vanessa Bell Calloway did a great job portraying her.  She lived a full life absolutely worth remembering and celebrating.  I think I may read "Their Eyes Were Watching God" again.  I haven't read it in years.

Oh, and I've been going to drag queen bingo just about every month now but I think I may give it a rest.  The proceeds are said to go to AIDS research so I never really felt bad about spending the $20 on my bingo cards or the extra money on food and drinks but I'm sick of not winning, lol.  I won once but it was a tie and the other woman broke the tie (suspiciously).  So I'm over bingo, as well.

And that's pretty much what's been going on with me...sort of.

My last day of yoga was awful. First of all, I was anxious about going because I'd missed two sessions - one due to sheer laziness, and the second week it completely slipped my mind. So this past Wednesday I was on a mission to be zen. However, when I got in the studio and found out that we would be giving one another foot massages, I was anything but. I wanted to jump up and run the hell out of there. How disgusting! I didnt want to touch a strangers feet! All I kept thinking about was that episode of Martin when Shanehneh went "to town" on Marva's feet at the nail shop with a hand saw, or a grinder. After he announced that we'd be giving foot massages, I couldnt concentrate on the rest of the session and I certainly couldnt find enjoyment in anything that we did. It was a complete bust. And I ended up massaging the crusty, dusty feet of a fat white girl. Her heels felt like a cross between a brillo pad and a brick. And the rest of her foot was just a fat, dry, loaf of flesh :( Absolutely revolting. On top of that, he had us holding impossible poses for far too long, and then rolling our bodies across that hard, bamboo floor back and forth. My left breast is still sore. I think I may have discovered a lump this morning, too. If it's not gone by next week I'm going to the doctor. So then, towards the end of the class he began his sales pitch and completely lost me. At which point I said to myself "Val, you came, you saw, you know what the hoopla is about"...not much, really.