The costs of having and raising children greatly outweigh the benefits. Yet, despite this fact and this God-forsaken economy, many idiots are still getting themselves knocked up willingly. It’s mind-boggling, like a self-inflicted paper cut. Why would anyone want to do that to themselves? As a parent of one (and done), let me tell you, I am an authorized spokesperson and certified expert on the matter of parenting. And my studies show that, in exchange for having to spend thousands of dollars every year, parents get to become indentured servants for 18+ years to a whiny freeloader/s, changing shitty diapers/shitty clothing, possibly getting peed in the eye, enduring rancid bedroom and foot odors that permeate throughout the rest of the house, raucous sleepovers during school holidays that don’t necessarily coincide with work holidays, lousy children’s’ movies, sleepless nights, less sex, viruses, spam and spyware on the family computer as a result of secret porn viewing, excessive worrying, stress, tension, frustration, rebellion, entitlement, getting raped by afterschool care and the school bookstore for suspiciously lost or overdue books, among many, many other things. It’s much more than a laundry list, trust me. You can fool yourself into believing that you are the one in control but let me warn you, YOU ARE NOT. Nor will you ever be. Good luck trying to have a battle of wits with a crying newborn, a tantrum throwing 2 year old, or a rebellious teenager. Who do you think will get the best of whom? Think about it. Who's actually winning those battles? If you care even a shred, you'll be on the losing end more often than not.
No one in their right mind would sign up to pay for this thankless job. On the contrary, no matter how well you do as a parent, if your kid, who has a mind of his own, fucks up, society blames YOU. Yes, that’s right. You get no thanks, no recognition for raising responsible adults who might be an asset to society, but you will get ostracized if your kid grows up and becomes an asshole, despite your best intentions and efforts to prevent it. And what kid doesn’t have a mind of their own? Genes be damned. It’s totally a crap shoot. Don’t fool yourself into believing otherwise.
Frankly, I am of the opinion that my retirement savings is infinitely more important than a teenager driving or having a college savings account. I paid for my own college and continue to do so. It’s the gift that I continue to give myself, reluctantly, and is the way of the free world. But the buck has to stop somewhere so in my mind kids should fund their own education and lifestyles once they turn 18. It’s only right. But don’t think that I don’t love my kid, because I do. Otherwise, I would have quit this job years ago. It’s not his fault that I allowed myself to get knocked up, decided to carry him to term and keep him. And for whatever its worth, he has brought a smile to my face on more than a few occasions over the many, many years we've been together. However, when it comes time for me to rest and count down my days on this Earth, I am not wholly confident that I can count on him for support. So what good is he? Lol. The money that I'm spending on him I could be using to fund my retirment. Undoubtedly, he will continue to lean on and leech off of me for years to come, well beyond his 20s and quite possibly a bit into his 30s. As will his children. I’ve seen it happen to others time and time again. Now, I won’t leave him out on the porch when his 18th birthday arrives; I will continue to help him. But there are limits. Just like how Uncle Sam took away my $1500 child tax credit when he turned 17 last November (curses! @#$%%^! It’s not like I suddenly stopped taking care of my child last year. I deserve that credit, you rotten bastards!), I am taking that money back from him the minute he turns 18 this year, meaning he’ll get far less perks than before. And by March of this year, he’d better have a job or be doing something very productive with his time or else all hell will break loose in my house. Let freedom ring.
No one in their right mind would sign up to pay for this thankless job. On the contrary, no matter how well you do as a parent, if your kid, who has a mind of his own, fucks up, society blames YOU. Yes, that’s right. You get no thanks, no recognition for raising responsible adults who might be an asset to society, but you will get ostracized if your kid grows up and becomes an asshole, despite your best intentions and efforts to prevent it. And what kid doesn’t have a mind of their own? Genes be damned. It’s totally a crap shoot. Don’t fool yourself into believing otherwise.
Frankly, I am of the opinion that my retirement savings is infinitely more important than a teenager driving or having a college savings account. I paid for my own college and continue to do so. It’s the gift that I continue to give myself, reluctantly, and is the way of the free world. But the buck has to stop somewhere so in my mind kids should fund their own education and lifestyles once they turn 18. It’s only right. But don’t think that I don’t love my kid, because I do. Otherwise, I would have quit this job years ago. It’s not his fault that I allowed myself to get knocked up, decided to carry him to term and keep him. And for whatever its worth, he has brought a smile to my face on more than a few occasions over the many, many years we've been together. However, when it comes time for me to rest and count down my days on this Earth, I am not wholly confident that I can count on him for support. So what good is he? Lol. The money that I'm spending on him I could be using to fund my retirment. Undoubtedly, he will continue to lean on and leech off of me for years to come, well beyond his 20s and quite possibly a bit into his 30s. As will his children. I’ve seen it happen to others time and time again. Now, I won’t leave him out on the porch when his 18th birthday arrives; I will continue to help him. But there are limits. Just like how Uncle Sam took away my $1500 child tax credit when he turned 17 last November (curses! @#$%%^! It’s not like I suddenly stopped taking care of my child last year. I deserve that credit, you rotten bastards!), I am taking that money back from him the minute he turns 18 this year, meaning he’ll get far less perks than before. And by March of this year, he’d better have a job or be doing something very productive with his time or else all hell will break loose in my house. Let freedom ring.
Now having said all that let me also let the record reflect that my kid is a good kid. He’s kind, caring, responsible enough that I don’t lose sleep, respectful, drug-free, gang-free, modest, funny, sweet, and normal. But he still costs money, lol.
